April 10, 2011
I went to the grocery store today. I couldn't believe how healthy I have become. In my basket was nothing but green organics, probiotics, olive oil (yeah, that's right: SCREW YOU MR. CANOLA FARMER WITH YOUR "RAPESEED" AND OMEGA 6's!), a dark dark chocolate bar, and some blueberries and mint green Twinings tea. With one more thing to pick up.
When I got to the bulk nuts & candies aisle I noticed this attractive twenty-something year-old brunette also looking for some healthy snack alternatives. So what with me being such a big (milk) dud n' all, I carefully pulled the lever to retrieve my 300g of unsalted almonds, pecans, and walnuts while she cased the cashew containers. (How embarrassing would that have been if I spilled my bag of nuts everywhere!)
Then with some semi-preconceived notion to approach the little label taggies and pen on that stretchy coiled wire at the same time as her, I stole a peanut-sized glimpse into her hazelnut eyes. She smiled and I asked her about her yogurt-covered raisins. She said they are actually pretty healthy despite them being stored right beside the jube-jubes and M&Ms. Mmmm jube-jubes... I was enjoying myself, wishing that I would have bothered to shower today, and tried to keep the conversation going by talking about glosette raisins. My time was running out. She said to me that usually she likes to mix them up with other nuts n' things. So I lifted my bag and said "like these?" She said "exactly!" And I said "That sounds pretty good! How would you like to come and mix your raisins with my nuts?"
50 years later we shared this story with our grandchildren. I was 77.
Then again, maybe I'm just one big pistachio.