2017 Was A Joyous Year, Too

Wow I reviewed my blog and indeed 1 year ago, I posted about how 2016 was reckoned by many to be The Worst Year Ever  Or Whatever. Nothing's changed. 2017, I admit, was a doozie - BUT - sometimes I feel it's just the nature of human beings (or media?) to identify with the shittiest of things in order to boost their outlooks of their own personal lives. Yes. Trump became president. An endless list of male dirtbag Hollywood stars, members of the media, and politicians of all rankings across the globe were called out for being disgusting, specifically in a way that abuses and exploits their female counterparts. Prominent media person Brittney Rudyck brought awareness to these shitty things on a local level, as an Edmonton venue ended up closing its doors after allegations and investigations of sexual misconduct of its owners were made. Personally, I feel that the #metoo movement is a direct result of having elected a fucking POTUS that is guilty of displaying masochistic behaviour all his life. I am thankful that women at least got a voice this year for the shit that they've been having to put up with for ever.  What else happened. Mary Tyler Moore died. So did Leonard Cohen, Della Reese, AC/DCs Malcolm Young, Bill Paxton, Tom Petty, Chris Cornell, Linkin Park's Chester Benington, Adam West, Prodigy, and - one that brought a tear to every Canadian's eye: Gord Downie. Also: hundreds of others. Cynics say: "well, all people die". But nevertheless it is still very sad.

Aside from the deaths and the dirtbags, one might argue that the world is in a pretty fragile state as of December 2017: talk of nuclear war, millions displaced in Syria/ the middle east, "Russia Problems", a more divided America than ever, the realization of the effects of climate change (I haven't seen this little snow at Christmas in Edmonton in years).

Are you miserable yet?

2017 wasn't all bad though. So if you  can't get beyond that Schadenfreude attitude, you can fuck right off. I am going to say I liked 2017 for the following reasons:

Kayla. The love of my life makes it easier to swallow all the BS listed above.

My family. It's been great to see my family grow by marriage, and also having reached out to others near and far. Also my cats & dog.

The music. I am not closed-minded and therefore enjoyed new music from bands like The National, Worst Days Down, LIGHTS, 88 Fingers Louie, The Shins, Mobina Galore, Jay-Z, Nothington, Body Count, Future Islands, The Menzingers, Dave Hause, The Flatliners, Jesse LeBourdais, Hot Water Music, Frenzal Rhomb, Comeback Kid, The Bronx, The Bombpops, Badcop/Badcop, Authority Zero, Dropkick Murphys, Rancid, others... 

The concerts.
belvedere at the needle,

worst days down album release at QA hall,

against me and descendents @ union

said the whale at starlight room, 
the wheat pool at the needle,

murder by death + tiger army, the ranch,

forester w/ klusterfunk and abandin all hope, grizzly trail (needle),

jesse lebourdais from that super awesome band cambridge, BUCK

comeback kid sitting down upstairs, 

menzingers a week later,

iron chic with that owth band that i think is kinda neat.
+ those 25 rockfest bands i saw in QC in june (namely: mute, ignite, PUP, bad religion, killswitch engage, face to face, AWS, good riddance, afi, pennywise, and masked intruder)

There were probably a few others mixed in there throughout the year too, but those were definitely the highlights. One of the other great "shows" we saw this year was Phantom of the Opera at the Jubilee Auditorium. Can't go wrong with a little Andrew Lloyd Webber.

The movies. I'd be hard-pressed to list all of them but off the top of my memory: Beauty and The Beast starring Hermione Granger (preceded with a date night to The Melting Pot). Moana. Coco. Another Pirates of the Caribbean & Guardians of the Galaxy & Despicable Me & John Wick & Lego movie, Wonderwoman, The Justice League, Japan's Your Name, The Big Sick... From home, we loved zombie flick Train To Busan. Also: Game of Thrones, The Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt, Master of None, and Orange Is The New Black. Star Wars Episode VIII was released last week (I guess Rogue One is a 9th movie). We will hopefully check that out before January.

The trips. Kay & I haven't bought into the whole traditional wedding customs, albeit we had that beautiful outdoor ceremony surrounded by family and friend. Therefore, we never really planned that out-dated constraint of needing to go on a honeymoon. Rather, we are very excited to travel with each other as much as we can wherever we can. It just so happens that 2 months after our wedding we ended up in DisneyLand. That was a great time: Halloween Time was happening and the parks were done up accordingly. The rides were as good as ever and the snacks were even better. In total, I've done DisneyLand in 1988, 1994, 2008, 2013 and 2017. In 1998 I did DisneyWorld and in December 2014. We'll be good for Disney for a while. We will see where we get to next, but with the wedding this year, we were happy enough just to do this short trip and have a couple of ski trips. I was pretty lucky to be able to do this trip this year too...

The job. Oh I got a job in 2017. That's kind of a big deal.  Especially if you want to go on trips. Or eat.

Her work/school. She's doing a great job balancing all that and accomplishing loads always. Super-proud of her.

The house. I've been here 16 years now. It's been good to me and now us. I am loving what we are getting figured around the house. I hope to have more friends around more often in 2018.

The instagram: #mdotmilo fml. Also, other hashtags. Eek. (say: #ryz2017pt1, #ryz2017pt2, #ryz2017pt3, #ryz2017pt4, #ryzstagvacay, #vidzbyry, #go2thesho, #nofuckingfilterEH, #ryansgettingmarriedEH,  #kaymarriesry, and #ryangotmarriedEH). #mdotkaykay, #fuzzbombfelix, and #mdotjdog are OK too. #ryanspunkrockmusic and #legovignettesbyryan and countless others are in there, too. As I say: fml.

So yeah. It's been a good time. Despite the world and all of its atrocities, there have been some wonders, too. (i.e the description of ths blog)

kbye. 

Phase III Begins (AKA my Wedding post)

MY STORY CONTINUES...

When I look at my life, it is easy for me to split it up into phases. The first: Years 1 thru 18. A generally genuinely healthy childhood filled with hockey and cartoons and mickey mouse and school. The 2nd phase includes my young "adult" life: learning how to drink beer, getting through the distressing implications of failing university exams, figuring out how to talk to girls, and learning how to spend my time on the people or things most important to me. Ultimately, this decade-long phase led me to becoming the man I am today: a newly married man who could only find a himself a bride as wonderful as she is, thanks, in part, to the values I developed through Phase II, and also to the values instilled in me by Mom in those formative Phase I years. After all, how a man responds to crisis and interacts with family will definitely make a difference as to the type of partner he will attract.

That transition from Phase II to Phase III went relatively fast. My bride and I dated for about 40 months before getting wed. My Mom was in and out of cancer treatments for 41 months. The end of Phase II and the beginning of Phase III amount to 7 years of some of the saddest and happiest days I've lived. My wife will tell you that I have claimed that Ages 8 through 12 (Phase I) were my happiest, but I would submit that those days were a different kind of happiness.  It's also conceivable that each Phase could be split into 3- or 4-year sub-sections: each where our personalities develop and our values change. Certainly, a 21-year old will have a different mindset than a 25-year old (at least in some ways) and the same can be said for Ages 6 vs. 10 or 14 vs. 17. I was not quite 30 when my Mom died and I was definitely different than I was 3 years earlier, before she got sick. My Phase II was unmistakenly ending.

WDW. That was not a bad way to move forward with Phase III of my life. It was helpful to be working again, and my Mom showed me how to have relatively affordable adventures for nearly 3 decades so spending a week in Florida was going to work out fine. I just knew that my girlfriend and I were going to have a good time together. In addition to Mickey Mouse and Harry Potter, we were slated for the Gainesville Propagandhi NYE show too! It is hard to say for sure the exact moment I fell in love with her was, but that trip was pretty damn' special. 11 months later I was proposing to her at the Lincoln Centre in NYC. 

I wouldn't call it a prolonged engagement but it allowed Kayla and I to really look at what this Phase III could potentially look like if we took the time and care in our relationship. The 21 months gave us ample time to plan our wedding and continue to simply enjoying doing the fun things like skiing Skoki and going to Mexico while loving our Cosmo, Jasper, Milo - and eventually - Felix!

Phase III included my adopting my Mom's maiden name, as she and her Mom meant more to me than my Dad ever did. It also gave us the comfort in both building something exciting and new with a legal change of name in our married life together. 

I would be amiss to not detail one of the biggest highlights of Phase III (to date). That would be the last Saturday in August where my Kay and I met to be wed on a warm summer day on the University of Alberta's Devon Botanic Gardens. My fiancée found a beautiful place before she found her groom, and I couldn't have been happier to join her in a non-religious ceremony in front of our most cherished friends and family.  She looked absolutely incredible. A stunning dress with all the right parts and teal shoes and an ovarian cancer ribbon and perfect hair topped with a tiara. Her face is super-beautiful, too. This Phase III thing was just getting better and better hour by hour...

We had an amazing wedding party, including her nurse friend, a high school friend, and a sister-in-law. I too had a high school friend who was able to perform violin for the ceremony, as well as stand as a groomsman. He played pieces from Studio Ghibli (specifically, a piece from Howl's moving castle called Merry-go-round of Life. My best man did a splendid job from morning to night (and the previous night letting me crash on his cot) and his sister and a British Columbian Colombian stood up for me as well.

We had a great party at the Lois Hole Enjoy Centre in St. Albert. We had the BEST food and an even better photographer that captured moments to late into the evening. Me and my new wife gave the most sincere of speeches, and my Best Man Matt's words were probably another highlight of the evening. A fun photobooth and a funny DJ topped it all off. I am pretty sure most people had almost as good of a time as me!

Our wedding allowed me opportunity to see family I wouldn't have ever expected to see soon otherwise, and also let me to get to know more of my bride's family better as well. I HAVE A SISTER NOW! AND NOT 1, NOT 2, but 3 NEPHEWS!! Too rad. I love all her family: it's nice to have family here that I know love me and I can love back just as much.
So there you have it. My life interpreted in 3 short phases. I think this 3rd will be AOK. I can't say for sure what the next will entail, but when it comes, I will take it all in stride. Until then I will continue to enjoy each and every day as much as I can with my sweet sugarplum.